The Pet Blues

I lost a lot of childhood memories after a head injury from a skiing accident over decade ago and it wasn't until very recently that I started trying to remember my early years. A good friend of mine (see Inn of the Wandering Dragon) was blogging about a turtle she has at her office, which triggered a rare memory from my childhood.

I used to have a couple of turtles as pets. I've always liked aquatic animals and my Mom bought me a turtle when I was probably around 10 to 12 years old. He lived in a shallow tub which I cleaned every other day and some rocks to perch on. When we bought him (my Mom called it a "he" but I don't know what gender it was), he was only about an inch in diameter shell-wise. He grew into a fairly large turtle, about 3" - 4". He also had a companion turtle in the tub but he never grew to be as big as "my" turtle.

I don't think I ever gave him a name. I used to pick him up after returning from school and stroked his head gently with my finger. He seemed to like it and stuck his head out to ridiculous lengths whenever I did that. He would come only to me; if my Mom or Dad showed up, he'd hide underneath the rocks with the other turtle.

We ended up setting him loose at my Dad's insistence. So we released him into the stream near our house; my Dad wrote some religious symbols (a curse?) on the bottom of his shell so that other people wouldn't try to eat him when they caught him - I grew up in a Third World country where turtles (or any animals) get eaten due to scarcity of food. Much to my regret, we never did get another turtle after that.

I also had a fish tank with angelfish when I was around 16 years old, about 5 of them. I used to stare at the fish for hours on end; to this day, only two things, stargazing and watching my kids sleep can give me the same feeling of peace and contentment. The odd thing was, the angelfish recognized me. When I come near the fish tank, they'd all flock to the front, peering at me with their fishy eyes. It didn't work when other people came - they all flitted away to hide behind the weeds.

According to my Mom, one week after I left for Canada, all my fish committed suicide by jumping out of the tank at night. I'm not sure what happened - maybe the water pump failed or something. My Mom insists that they did that because they missed me. I'm not sure I can face that if it were true.

I've never been a dog or cat person but I've always been able to "connect" with fishy/aquatic pets. I'm not sure why I'm blogging this. I guess I'm feeling awfully lonely these days despite being surrounded by people. I love my family but the relationship we have with our pets is a very different one that is equally as precious. I really really do want to have a pet, perhaps a turtle terrarium. Unfortunately, that's not going to happen anytime soon so all I have left are memories. Sometimes, that's all one ever has.