Nobody move! I've dropped me Brain*

WARNING: long rambling posting about outliners and mind-mappers below. If you liked my former entry titled Notebook buying hoops then you'll like this one. Otherwise, you may wish to consider skipping this entry.

I blew up yet another outliner a couple of days ago. The good bit is that I've done a lot of research into outliners, mind-mappers and task managers in the last few days. The bad news is that I blew up my entire list of tasks after I decided to stick with my existing outliner app.

Before you ask, yes, of course I have backups. Unfortunately, the latest backup is over 6 months old. Bad Kate! Do backups regularly!

I had three choices: switch over to a pen/paper daytimer, rebuild my tasklist using the old backup and what's in the old noggin or get a new app that's got proven scalability.

I have already been trying to use a pen/paper solution for some time now. It doesn't work for me because daytimers can only hold up a year's worth of calendar entries and my detailed planning horizon has always been 3-5 years. It may not seem like much but for me, it's a deal-breaker.

I tried rebuilding my old tasklist but while I was reviewing the items in the backup file, I was unprepared for what a dear friend of mine calls "cognitive dissonance". Simply put, when I started the very first version of that list many years ago, I was a very different person - literally! I took a look at my life goals last night and realized that they just don't fit who I've become anymore. I carried this primary goal around for two decades: I want to be definitively, unarguably successful. The thing that's changed is subtle: I still want to be definitively, unarguably successful...in taking care of my family. That doesn't involve making megabucks - it involves raising the kids right (but I will be the first to admit that money helps). I'm not interested in seeing how high up the corporate ladder I can go anymore; I do want to help and support my sis to be the best she can be. In that light, most of my goals and tasks carried over from the backup file rang hollow. So I binned the lot.

I started over with a fresh OmniOutliner file but then quickly realized that what I needed was a goal-centric planner, not a tasklist manager. So I reinstalled PersonalBrain Pro 4.0 and started building a thought map of who I am and what was important to me. It just took off from there: free from the tyranny of due dates and task hierarchies, I rebuilt my life goal from scratch.

That was last night. In less than 24 hours, I have well over a hundred thoughts and goals mapped out, all with flexible links that not only let me quickly adapt to changes in my daily life but more importantly, keep my goals in sight and in mind.

So I bit the bullet and purchased PersonalBrain. Fortunately, they have an educational discount and by flushing my entire discretionary budget for the next few months, I could just barely afford it. I did some quick math a few minutes ago: in less than a day and I'm down to just less than 25 cents per use of each thought. Not a very stringent metric but it indicates one trend: the intense usage pattern fits a critical daily app rather than an occasional app, so I will definitely get at least my money's worth.

For those of you who knew me in my previous life, this will be poignant: remember when I used to barbeque using a stopwatch? I *needed* precision and control in my life then and my tasklist reflected that - everything has a due date and is sorted into one of a horrifically complicated ordering system of Now, Today, Tomorrow, This Week, Next Week, This Month, Next Month, Next Quarter, Next Year, Next 3 Years and Next 5 Years. Today, I have exactly four categories in my PersonalBrain: Expedite, Soon, Later and Done!

It's too early to tell for certain but I know this: I'm far less stressed or afraid of my To Do list now. The simple change of not being confronted from the get-go by a solid wall of due dates has seriously helped my stress level. Yes, I know I'm insane for spending so much time and effort into this and at the first glance, you're absolutely right. Then I hear the kids softly snoring upstairs - if this lets me plot a safe path for the family through an uncertain future by identifying what needs to be done at the right time for the right person and for the right reasons, then yes, it'll all be worth it.

*A quote by Jack Sparrow in Pirates of the Caribbean 3: At World's End.