Freedom in restraint

When I was a small child, I used to look forward to family occasions like birthdays when my parents would get me a gift. Being a child, those moments come few and far in between.

When I graduated and got a good job, I finally had the financial wherewithal to get what I wanted. Not what I needed, mind - this was strictly a matter of wanting, not actual need.

Over time, I figured out that material gain doesn't equate to happiness, or at least permanent happiness, so I curbed my spending significantly. Now, being unemployed and all, the belt is tightened even more.

Back when I relied on my parents for financial support, a major element was anticipation. Sometimes, the weeks leading up to my birthday were the best. I've lost a lot of that over time, in the beginning because I could afford what I wanted and later on because I would figure out it's not worth getting it and the idea died stillborn. These days, the element of anticipation has returned but not in the same way. It has to do with doing more with less, so that when I *do* commit to a purchase, I know it's the best one I can make.

I'm on a minimal budget right now. One of the first and major effects is that it's forcing me to stop going to Starbucks. That alone has stopped me from vibrating in and out of phase during the day. The first couple of weeks were brutal...but I have escaped from the clutches of the Caramel Macchiato.

Secondly, it's making me consider even trivial purchases. In the past, if I'm out of pens, I'd just go and get one. These days, I have to consider the cost of it off my tiny budget. It's forced me to be more observant - which type of pen will last longer? Be more durable? More leak proof? Is this extraordinarily *ahem* anal-retentive behaviour? Yes and no. Sometimes we take for granted the small things. Remember that when you get a cheap Bic pen, someone had to have designed it years ago and that had consequences as to whether it was successful or not. It may not be important to us but it demanded at least one person's full attention at some time in the past. I rather like regaining my appreciation for good design. FYI, I settled on a Parker Jotter - it's been around for ages and they just don't design durable ballpoints (ugh) like that anymore.

Lastly, it's made me reexamine things I should have examined in the past. I'm not a big fast food fan but every now and then, I do nip into a food court to grab a bite to eat. Food portions have become ludicrously large and as a society, we have an obesity problem. Due to a constrained budget, I'm had to reconsider my actions and am now ordering off the kids menu. To my surprise, the portions are just right - I've found that the normal-sized serving is way too much. Plus, the prices are typically half that of normal orders. I've found I can have a filling (albeit fatty and unhealthy) lunch for just $2. Pricewise, you just can't beat that.

I will admit that I'm going overboard with my budgeting, that I really don't need to tighten the belt quite so much. We've been conservative with our finances and it has given us a buffer before we really have to batten down the hatches. Hopefully, knock on wood, I'll be employed soon and finances will be less of a worry. Regardless, I think I'll stick to my much smaller budget. It reduces waste, forces me to consider my spending more and it's good for the family. There really is more with less.